I love my nuts. So much so that I have named them – Jabu and Lani – I live vicariously through them and even revert to using them as puppets and talking with a Zulu and Indian accent, respectively when I am teabagging members of the opposite sex – true story!
Unfortunately, we sometimes take our testicles for granted, and as men, it isn’t always enough to have our wives, girlfriends, random Manhattan pickups perform oral examinations on our genitals.
We have to go above and beyond the call of duty, feel ourselves up whilst showering and take extra precautions to ensure there are no unnatural lumps or painful aspects plaguing our gonadal regions.
To raise awareness for testicular cancer, the guys at Etana sponsor the annual Daredevil Speedo run, where a sausage fest descends on Greater Johannesburg and red adorned cock lines the streets. Laydeez, breathe!
This year we are going for a World Record, and aim to have 1000 Speedo-rocking hotties (and even notties) displaying their anteaters and magic mushrooms loud and proud for the residents of our fine city, on October 15. Can I get a ‘Hell Yeah!’
Don’t be a pussy and sign up for the Speedo run here – there’s also a competition on at the moment where you and a mate can win a trip to Vegas, spending money included. Fuck YEAH! In order to win the trip you have to do some daring shit in aforementioned speedo.
To date, I have bungee’d from the Orlando Towers and crop-dusted Gareth Cliff. Links, videos, images included below. The competition is stiff (that’s what she said), but with your help, I know we can win this! If I go to Vegas, you’re all invited… you just have to buy your own ticket. You know I love you, but I’m an entrepreneur now and have no money to fly my own ass to Vegas. You understand, don’t you? Let’s hug it out!
Keep your eyes on my prize this weekend, there will be one last cocktail of speedo shenanigans to keep you entertained. If my penis ends up in your mouth this weekend, please be gentle.
Rock out with your cock out, you cheeky lil thangs
Orlando Towers Bungee
Talking cock with Gareth Cliff
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