I’d been banging on all week about the Amazing Race for Charity and how non-negotiable your attendance was. If you missed out, you definitely extended your liver’s sell-by-date past next Tuesday, but you should be suffering from the worst case of ‘FOMO losers’.

There was immense pressure on me and my team – The Legovers – to over-deliver on the fancy dress front, but like a Premature Peter, we succumbed to expectation…

Considering we only started production on our outfits the night before the race, we did a pretty damn good job, if I do say so myself!

The Legovers

But then this entered the fray…

Lego fancy dress - you fucking nailed it!

And cue LC for team The Legovers. Fuck I hate being outdone at fancy dress – it affects me on a deeper psychological level. We were like those poor kids at school who can’t afford to buy the coolest shit for their projects, so they resort to having their parents make the papier-mache-volcano-that-inevitably-implodes-because-they-were-too-bat-shit-stupid-to-pass-school-themselves-let-alone-add-any-value-to-your-school-career!

Focus suddenly shifted from winning best dressed, to having to actually win the race – bummer!

We tried our damndest. We had the right mix of guyPhones, crackberries and the worst best driver in the Greater Johannesburg Metropol to assist with task-completion. Red robots were a formality and speed limits became targets that needed to be smashed. New African records were set by the Mi-dawg on Saturday afternoon. I anticipate a surge in mail for the dear girl in the coming weeks – Bless!

In summary, we weren’t the Woza Winners, wena, but we had a bitchin’ day out and the after party that ensued at the Baron Wallstreet, has left black marks etched into my short-term memory.

Thanks to the gangstas at Halo – the self-titled ‘best brand led communications agency in the World’ and your mates who assisted you with the organisation of an EpicFierce race. Big up to @Jenty for taking some amazeballs images of the contestants – check them out here.

Apologies to all the laydeez who were subjected to my barcounter striptease and for those of you who I cave-manned over my shoulder and exposed your g-bangers to all residents of the Northern suburbs. Stay tuned for the video highlights and the awesomeness that was the ‘his head’s too small’ flashmob that stormed Nelson Mandela Square!

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